Ditching the “Do as I say, not as I do” mentality.

You remember when you were a kid and your parents lived by the motto, “Do as I say, not as I do?” When we were younger, it made sense. You did what your parents told you – regardless of what they did.

However, as an adult, more so a parent, I now know that that crap doesn’t work. As parents, we are the de facto model they use to know how to do, act, be responsible, good human beings.

I know we’ve all had that “Ah ha!” moment, when your child is doing something wrong and you realize they modeled the behavior by watching you. For me, those “wrong” modeled behaviors are aplenty. From eating and exercise habits to temper and anger management.

My most recent “aha” moment was yesterday morning when the kid was tying his shoes, and couldn’t get them exactly like he wanted. Instead of calmly trying again, he began yelling at his shoes, “Come on! Why aren’t you working?!” Before I could scold him for yelling and being so angry, I got an image of myself yelling at my laptop, cell phone, etc., when it didn’t work like I wanted it to. It was at that moment I decided to approach frustrating times the same way I encourage him to – with patience.

While it would be easy for me to adopt the “Do as I say, not as I do” mentality, I consciously try not to. I never want to hear him say, “Why can you do [INSERT BAD THING HERE] when I can’t?” And, I don’t want him making poor decisions because he perceived them as OK, because I he’s seen me make them – over and over again.

There’s a quote by an unknown author that goes, “Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.”

So, I ask you, how are you raising your kids? What examples are you setting for them? Leave your answers in the comments section below.

Never Been Here Before

Patience The Mom with Moxie

A few months ago, when the hubs and I were having a particularly bad time with the kid‘s behavior, my dad said to me, “Be patient, he’s never been seven before, and you’ve never parented a seven year old before.” Now, while the statement may seem simple, it’s really not. To me, what it means is that it’s all new to all of us. We can’t approach parenting and discipline like the kid already knows what’s going on. We need to address each new challenge with a fresh perspective. Otherwise, we’ll get stressed out and find no resolution.

I’m trying to approach things, from this point of view, but it’s hard. Really hard. It’s easy to say, “You’re seven years old, act like it!” But, really, how would he know how a seven year old is supposed to act? Heck, how do we know how a seven year old I supposed to act? Because really, my seven year old is different than every other seven year old. I just have to learn to approach parenting from this P.O.V.

What about you? How do you approach parenting? What’s your technique?

Seven, going on seventeen.

The Kid Seventh Birthday PicToday, my son, my baby, my big boy, you turn 7-years-old.

You, my dear son are so full of energy, so full of life.

You are the very definition of rambunctious.

You are, at times, seven going on seventeen.

You make every day an adventure.

You are, as they say, “all boy. “

You’re current interests (obsessions) are superheroes, play fighting, martial arts, robots, and – much to my chagrin – parkour.

I am grateful, that at seven, you still want to snuggle with me and your dad (“Snugs ‘n Hugs,” as we call it).

For seven years, you have brought excitement, frustration, happiness and love into my life.

I can’t imagine a world without you.

I love you, and I thank God every day that he gifted me with you.

Happy birthday, baby.

25 Chore Ideas for Elementary Schoolers

25 Chore Ideas for Elementary Schoolers

I am a firm believer that chores teach kids responsibility. As such, the hubs and I are always looking for chore ideas, for the kid.  Here’s a list we came up with:

  1. Clean microwave
  2. Clean windows [no chemicals]
  3. Clear table
  4. Collect dirty clothes
  5. Collect garbage
  6. Dust [no chemicals]
  7. Get mail
  8. Help fold laundry
  9. Help separate dirty clothes
  10. Help with meal prep
  11. Load the dishwasher
  12. Make bed
  13. Pick up/ put away toys
  14. Put clothes away
  15. Rake leaves
  16. Set the table
  17. Sweep
  18. Unload the dishwasher [the non-breakables and NO knives!]
  19. Vacuum
  20. Wash dishes [with supervision – of course]
  21. Watering plants [with supervision]
  22. Weeding
  23. Wipe down baseboards
  24. Wipe down cabinets
  25. Wipe out bathroom counters, sinks, toilets

What do you think of my list? Have any ideas to add? Let me know in the comments section below!