Keeping the Flames Alive: The Importance of Intimacy In Marriage

A couple of years ago, I wrote this as a guest post for A Proverbs Wife. I thought with Valentine’s Day coming up, today was a good time to re-post.

Couple holding hands.

Intimacy is one of – if not the most – important aspects of a good marriage. While I recognize the importance of sex, in a marriage, that’s not all intimacy is about; it’s also about spending time together, getting to know each other, on a deeper level.

Let’s face it, marriage is hard. Between taking care of the kids, work and keeping house – making time for each other often falls by the way-side.

A good way to keep intimacy alive, in your marriage, is by purposefully scheduling alone time with one another.  Date nights, lunch dates and weekend trips (when you can find a sitter), are all great ways to do this. When scheduling your “dates,” try to make it a time when you know you have the full attention of each other and can really talk and connect with one another.

Even scheduling time for sex, with your spouse, can help. I know it takes the spontaneity out of it, but with all you have going on, it may be the only thing that works. If scheduling isn’t your thing, try making a promise to each other, that you’ll be intimate at least x times per week.

Its easy let the mundane tasks of everyday life; get in the way of spending time with your spouse. But, like everything else in a marriage, cultivating intimacy, requires work.

A few resources I recommend are:

Shannon Ethridge, author and advocate for healthy sexuality and spirituality. She has written several books on intimacy.

Dr. Gary Chapman, internationally respected marriage and family life expert. Dr. Chapman is the author of many books, including The Five Love Languages.

Dr. Kevin Leman, author, speaker, founder & president of Couples of Promise. He has written books on marriage, children and family.

photo source

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